Yeah we try to get everyone! Sometimes the parents of the boyfriends/girlfriends of our kids show up too, even the kids who moved away, or any 'orphans' from my work. Everyone brings something. My ex MIL brings thanksgiving (like literally I think she makes a turkey too and just doesn't bring it) I can never figure out if she is trying to show me up or what but it means I can make vegan versions of sides for the vegans, so it works out.

I cook for like 3 days to stage it but once done I let others set it out and clean up too. I just sit down, have a drink, and eat and hang out. Of course there's always more cleanup at the end but worth it.

Highly recommend consolidating it if you have the space. So much fun.

It's harder to do if you have a large extended family, especially if another family member usually hosts.

My wife's family was like that before her grandma and great uncle died.